Mothering Many

Dear Kids,
Thank you so much for polishing off an entire box of popcorn and four bags of Doritos over the weekend. I know you only did it because you love me and don’t want me to get fat. But I would have enjoyed the popcorn, and they do make weight loss pills if I totally lose control of myself.

I do like to share with you, don’t get me wrong. But share implies that I get some, too.
Love,
Mom