So, I’ve been in the house with my children since Monday night at 8:30 pm, because of the snowpocolypse we aren’t having. We have sleet instead. This togetherness will continue at least through Friday morning, as all classes are cancelled for all of us again tomorrow– one of the benefits of living in a place that has neither snow plows not salt. Anyway, if you expected to hear me complain, I am not. I’m enjoying just hanging out with my children. Although they make so much noise, we don’t need a bogner amp at Guitar Center, all of us being here together reminds me of when I homeschooled..
This is not a tale of pearl necklaces. This is a tale of socks. You really need to pick them up off the floor, dig them out from under the couch cushions, and search the under-bed caverns for those delightful lttle balls of foot funk. Also, if you want them returned to you in matching sets of two, one for each foot, bring them to the laundry hamper that way.
So, we made it. Another Christmas done. Now we can pack away the tree. The ornaments. The glitter from said ornaments. Spring pins at reidsupply.com. Cookie crumbs. Snips and spits of tape. Sometimes I think the idea of spring cleaning started with one woman’s frustration in trying to deal with Christmas clutter. It does indeed seem like it would be far simpler to tip the house up and shake everything that’s not nailed down out through the front door, doesn’t it?
Now you all know what I will be about this week.
Dear Kids that I left alone:
One of you is grown and the other 15. I left you a clean house. Why did I come home to such a mess? Did you think you had been suddenly transported to one of those five star New Mexico hotels? I mean, I know we all want to be at a place where the linens are changed daily, and the maids remove all evidence of our tendency to slovenliness, and smile pleasantly while they place a mint on the pillow of the turned down bed.
But. This is not a hotel. This is home. This is where when we make a mess, we have to clean up after ourselves. And that thing where you told me I was the mom and it was my job to clean up the kitchen that I hadn’t set foot in for 10 days? Completely unacceptable. You cook it, you eat it, you clean it up.
You act like you haven’t had any raising at all. Use the tools. The vacuum is in the corner. The dishwasher packs are on the counter. The toilet scrubbing pads are in the cabinet.
Get with the program or you may find yourselves at one of those hotels. As staff. Perhaps they will give you a room in exchange for cleaning up other people’s messes. Although I think you’d be much smarter to continue to enjoy the benefit I give you here of room AND board in exchange for cleaning up your own.
One Fuming Mother
why must you laugh and giggle while averting your eyes when you see me working out? I know this was strange and unusual on days 1-5, but I’ve been at it for 30 days, today, and yet you still look at me as if I am crazy. Why don’t you join me? We could shop for best selection of yoga balls and make this a family affair!
I know it’s summer and you are off school and you think you have no responsibilities until August. But this post is to announce that unless you want to start looking for houses for sale jacksonville nc, you do have responsibilities. One of them is to continue picking up after yourself and the other is to help me keep the family areas tidies. Now, all this shouldn’t take more than half an hour per day, and one pointed reminder. Let’s make it so!
Please for the love of the rest of the family, clean your bathroom. It truly is a beautiful room. You have neutral ceramic tile in there, the nicest of 36″ bathroom vanities, and large toothpaste splattered mirror. Now, it’s true that at this point we can’t see the tile because it is covered in smelly boy laundry. Nor was I able to spot more than three square inches of the vanity because of the scatter of personal care products. I know you can do better. I know you will do better. Rise up, the three of you, and slay the Gross Bathroom Monster. The rest of us are counting on you to capture and destroy that thing before it escapes the bathroom and wrecks the rest of the house!
Turn your music down. I have given you the scientific facts regarding how hearing loss happens. I have told you that you would remember that conversation when you could not hear the laughter of your grandchildren. And yet you do not listen. You wear ear buds, and I can plainly hear your tunes. Maybe you are deaf already! You certainly act like you expect the bids to perform like excellent ibanez amps.
I know you like my toolbox. It’s a handy repository for all the stuff you need to fix your bikes, hang a picture, tighten this, loosen that. Yeah, it’s wonderful. But here’s the thing. It used to be full and now it’s empty, except for on hammer and a few nails and screws in the botoom. So what happened? Where are my tools? Please return my Phillips, my flat-tip, my toggle clamps, and my wrench. Kthanksbye
Please be wise with your money. There are ways to save on almost everything. And I do mean almost everything. Look: discount cigars. See? And while we are discussing being financially astute, let’s talk about saving my money—please close the door after you come through it, so I can better keep the power on for you! Also, turn off the lights and get out of the fridge. Again. We can work together on all this.